How to Survive the Holidays Sober Together

Maintaining sobriety can be especially hard during the holiday season when you can feel pressure from family or colleagues to indulge. Here are some ways to resist peer pressure and honor your commitment.

Prepare yourself. Be prepared for people to notice and ask questions or make assumptions. You can practice your response ahead of time to help you feel more comfortable in claiming your sobriety as a personal choice. You don’t have to go into a long explanation. If anyone asks why you’re not drinking, you can simply state that you’re “living a healthier lifestyle which doesn’t include drinking”.  If people continue to pressure you, politely say “no thank you” and walk away to engage with others and enjoy yourself. 

Manage “FOMO.” You may feel a “fear of missing out” or like you don’t belong anymore, especially if the gatherings have a heavy emphasis on drinking. Root into your reasons for choosing sobriety and celebrate that you are being true to yourself.  Some folks in early recovery (or even later stages of recovery) chose to arrive a little late to the gathering and leave a little early. This way they can enjoy the party but not feel overwhelmed.    

Take the spotlight off you. People love to talk about themselves. If you feel especially self-conscious without any “liquid courage,” take a moment to soothe and calm your nervous system by taking some deep breaths. Then as you look around the room, describe three things you like. Next, try asking people questions and focus on really staying present. In this age of distractions, people crave undivided attention. Your genuine interest is a gift they will remember. 

Trust that in time all of this will get easier. If you are the host, let guests know that alcohol will not be provided and that they should bring their own if they want it. You don’t need to feel bad or embarrassed. Some guests sometimes bring alcohol to a gathering. Other times they also chose not to drink. As time goes by, each outing and gathering will get easier!

If you or a loved one are struggling with alcohol and/or drugs and you’d like some help, please call me. Let’s come up with a solution together! Please contact me, Joe Ortiz, to learn more. You can call me at 732-599-7817 or fill out the private contact form on this website. Thank you!